Here we are on Day 9 of the Lockdown. I’m slowly losing the will to live – thinking of throwing myself in front of anyone with a cough. No doubt to their astonishment.
I don’t know how people are managing. Should there be a limit to the number of daytime quizzes you can put on the channels? Surely people must be fed up of them by now? And please Lord, no more Bargain Hunt. There are no bargains! It’s all a con. When I finally become Benevolent Dictatrix of the People’s Republic of Strange (BD of PRS) this will one of the first things I deal with. That and making sure that people know their 75 times table to make Countdown easier. Sensible policies for a sensible gulag! I think there is a growing movement for this kind of detail sorting. I certainly hope so!
As the putative BD of PRS I am, of course, concerned for my devoted citizens. I have shown my regard for them by failing to take delivery of a new phone, not recording a programme they wanted to see and using all the hot water so they can’t have a bath. With great power comes great responsibility or so I’ve been told. I have no experience of this as yet. I do have experience of screaming, crying and carrying on something woeful though.
I’m thinking of publishing my manifesto in the near future. When we finally get back to normality I may stand on a Strange ticket so you can all have the opportunity to vote for Strange Policies for a Stranger Britain. Until that point you may be sure that I will be keeping my Strange end up!
Remember stay safe and well and that this too will pass.
* The sun always shines in Stalag Strange – you should all know that